A first grader comes home and announces to his father that he had sex with his teacher.
Well, his father's chest just swells with pride and he says to his son, "I was a freshman in college before I had sex with my teacher. I'm very proud of you son. You know that bicycle that you've been wanting for so long? I'm going to take you out and buy it for you today!"
His son says, "Well if it's all the same to you dad, I'd rather go tomorrow. My butt's still sore."